• Mary

Behind The Closed Door

Isn’t it cool how God speaks to everyone differently? Yet, He always speaks to us clearly, in a way which we will eventually understand. For me, I am a very visual and creative person and so quite often He speaks to me through images. Usually I hear God when I come directly to Him and am seeking His voice, however, recently I was falling asleep when I suddenly had a vivid image racing through my head. I suddenly woke up, grabbed my phone and voice recorded what the image was (because although I was excited, I was exhausted and way too tired to try write anything).

I saw myself gaining access to a door which I shouldn’t have found. Inside this door was hundreds of thousands of words and plans, all about me, but I couldn’t make sense of them. I began searching for something, but I didn’t know what. I could see the odd word, but this was tricking and upsetting me more, hurting me almost. But then I realised I was seeing God’s plans for my life, but at the wrong time. I suddenly stopped and knew when it is the right time, God will happily give me the exact location of where to go in the room, so that I don’t go in and find myself completely overwhelmed but feel confident about where God is sending me.

I am in a very confusing time in life where I have no idea what is next for me. People keep reminding me of how exciting this is, because I ‘have no ties and am free to go wherever’. And that’s great, truly it is exciting that I have a blank page in front of me but equally I have a blank page in front of me, with no instructions and no plan. Nope.

Getting this image from God, was exactly what I needed to give me peace in this place of uncertainty. God does promise that He knows the plans he has for us, that they are good, to give us a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29v11). That we should trust in God with all our heart and He will make our paths straight (Proverbs 3v5-6). And I knew this, but I needed God’s confirmation and comforting voice, which He – as always – provided.

Thinking about it too, if we always knew what was coming next, our lives would be really boring! I recently went to Alton Towers for my first time, I was so excited and there was one ride in particular that the people who had been before, were anticipating the most. Not for themselves though but for me. This ride is called ‘Thirteen’ and the whole day they were telling me that I needed to wait to find out what happened – don’t worry no spoilers - They gave no hints or clues to what it was, and this was annoying but when I finally experienced it, I was so glad of my lack of prior knowledge. It was full of surprises and adrenalin and was incredible. I think this is why God keeps things from us, like my friends did from me, because when we finally experience it, we are even more wowed by its outcome!

BTW – also notice that my friends were with me throughout the entire wait! They never left my side (even during the 100-minute ques!). God also never leaves our side as He excitedly watches us, patiently waiting for His plans to be revealed.

If we were always handed things as we wanted them, we would never need Him. He wants us to desire Him and to be passionate about seeking Him, sometimes this means being uncertain, because without uncertainty, we can’t learn trust and dependency on Him. Sometimes, this ambiguity can feel cruel. It can feel as though God is keeping secrets from us and hiding away. But that’s not true. In my picture, the door is not locked but it should be closed until God’s perfect timing. So, no, God isn’t hiding His plans from us, they are right there, we have full access to them, but equally He doesn’t want to reveal things to us, until we are ready to hear them, understand them and be willing and fully equipped to act on them! This is why it is so important for us to not act out of frustration, from not hearing God, but to be patient and trust completely in his unwavering promises.

They will exceed all expectations.

God, I’m sorry for being impatient and getting frustrated at not knowing. Today I choose to trust you fully with my future. I choose to trust in your perfect timing, to believe that you are not hiding things from me, but you are preparing me for when I am ready to know the plans you have for me, which are for good. Father I pray that I will not fear this time of waiting but instead will see this as an exciting adventure - God take me on an adventure with you. I can’t wait for you to lead me into the life you have for me, help me to always keep you at the centre and not try and go beyond what you are saying. Thank you that you never leave my side, that I will never have to go on this journey alone. Thank you for the plans you do have for me.


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